


Matters Of The Heart

by Softrockandshowtunesgirlscout22



Category: E.R.
Genre: AU, Carby - Freeform, F/M, I'm having feels its been 15 years, My babies had a baby
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-25
Updated: 2018-03-09
Packaged: 2019-03-23 20:49:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13796079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Softrockandshowtunesgirlscout22/pseuds/Softrockandshowtunesgirlscout22
Summary: AU. Set in 2017. When Abby and Luka travel back to Chicago for Rachel Green's wedding, a lot of feelings, past and present are put in play. Including those unfinished ones between Carter and Abby.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So... who else is having ER feels after the show was put on streaming by Hulu. This is AU but follows most of the timeline and characters of the show. Aso, Carter and Abby had a son in 2003.

Abby was grateful their trip to Chicago happened during the summer, she had already suffered enough cold nights in Boston as it was. She made sure her carry on bag was securely next to the her of the luggage as she watched the boys making their way over.

Luka, the one she couldn't possibly miss because of just how tall he was, waved at her;he had managed to sneak over with the rest of the luggage and a cart which AJ pushed forward with little effort;Luka had a hand placed in Joe's shoulder.

"Finally. What took you guys so long?" She asked, AJ, true to his teenage nature rolled his eyes at her. It was spooky just how much his kid took after Carter in almost every way.

"You know you could just say thank you, we almost didn't get one Mom." AJ said, even the way he talked sounded just like Carter.

"Thank you." Abby said. AJ gave her a small smile as he and Luka put the rest of the luggage on the cart.

"Why we need so many bags is a mystery to me." Luka added as the family walked over to the exit. Abby pushed the stroller where the latest addition of the family slept soundly.

Niko had been a trooper the whole flight thankfully. "You are the one with the most bags. It's just one for the boys and two more from me and one for AJ." Abby added in. Joe and AJ laughed at the prospect of Luka being told off.

"Are you sure he got the time right?" Luka asked. Carter had offered to pick them up from the airport.

"Of course, I just texted him." Abby said. "Everyone's got everything?"

"Yep!" Joe said, her son, almost 10, smirked. If AJ was all Carter, Joe took after Luka for sure, a reminder for Abby of two of the most important people in her life. Even in the years after her dramatic breakup with John, the loss of Joshua and sharing a child, Abby understood she'd always love Carter.

"Mommy, I'm tired..." A small voice called. Niko was just shy of turning 5, he'd been their last addition of the family, a baby born via surrogate as Abby wasn't able to carry more children, lord knows she and Luka had experienced hardship by trying to adopt and because of Abby's age, trying for a child after having struggled with complications with both her boys, Surrogacy seemed the way to as she and Luka longed for another baby.

Abby sometimes felt lost in her brood of boys but she couldn't deny she also felt special. It was quite an odd feeling.

"I think that's us." AJ said as he pushed the cart forward. "Hey Dad!"

Carter then parked the car, Abby hadn't seen him in a few months, he had allowed AJ to fly alone to Chicago a couple times now as she and Luka had gone to Croatia to see her father in law as his health began to deteriorate. Abby swore Carter looked younger this time around, his hair was longer and the beard was in full throttle, he waved at them and wrapped an arm around his son.

"Luka thought you'd forgotten about us." AJ said as he helped John and Luka load the car.

"I didn't..." Luka added in.

"What little faith you must have in me." Carter replied with a bit of mischief in his voice. "I got caught in a trauma, sorry-"

"It's fine Carter" Abby sighed as she jumped in the back of the car, securing Niko in her arms. "Let's go."

They drove over to the hotel, Cater had offered them to stay over at his family's house but they had declined, AJ though would be going back with him at the end of the day.

The prospect of spending the summer in Chicago with his dad always made her son happy and she wouldn't have it any other way.

Rachel Green was getting married.

It made Abby reconsider a lot of things, she hadn't known Mark like Carter and Haleh had, she had little right to be there but Rachel had insisted they were as much her family as the rest of the staff.

Most of them were there, Susan, Peter and Carol had made it back, Doug had remained back in Seattle working on an ongoing case, but she figured if there should be someone representing Mark's best friend, Carol had been the right person to come instead of Dr. Ross bringing the kids along for it.

Just as Abby, the Ross family had expanded over the years, a little boy had completed the family in 2007 much like Joe had come to make Abby's life a tad more chaotic.

"Mom?" the former nurse shifted in her flat shoes as she turned to face her son. "You okay?"

"Of course baby, I'm fine." Abby sighed, AJ was no baby anymore.

He was her little fighter, who just like Joe, had defied the odds against him and survived. He was born from a loving relationship between his parents but with an outcome that was less than ideal for the little one.

First off, she hadn't told Carter right away she'd been pregnant. She hadn't told him at all really, the memory of his move to Congo was still a bit too fresh and yet Luka had been Team Carter and told him he'd had a son shortly after she'd been born, a son who was loved and cherished by all the people around him.

Abby knew though that Carter regretted not knowing about it as he'd met AJ for the first time when he was around 5 months old after he'd come back from Africa.

But Luka, Abby and Carter were a kind of dysfunctional family that made it work. When Carter had lost Joshua, Abby made a promise to keep her son as close to John as she could, inspite of Kem's feelings.

Abby suspected the situation might have done something to do with the woman's abandonment of Carter after they'd lost their son but they never dwelled on it as it seemed too painful for the both of them to think just how it had gone down, Kem being just down selfish if you'd ask Abby, not that she'd ever admitted it to John.

The rehearsal diner had gone great. Elizabeth and Rachel's mom had cried as Jaime, Rachel's paramedic fiancé assured his love for her. Her eyes quickly searched for Luka's, he and Carter had sat next to each other in real camaraderie.

It still amazed her just how well those two got along, even with all the drama surrounding the little family she and her boys had made.

Her boys, she thought of her three little ones and two big ones. Carter and Kem had gotten a divorce finally as the years had dragged along for her and the pain of losing her son became more and more evident.

"Your mind seems to be all over the place." Carol Hathaway said with a smile. "Weddings huh? They bring all these feelings back"

"Which ones?"

"Husbands and kids, people that are not around anymore." Carol said. "It does to me, affect me I mean, specially with the kids here and Doug being gone."

"Right, yeah for me it's a little bit more complicated than that." Abby said sadly.

"Carter?"

Abby nodded. "How is he anyway?"

"He says he's okay, and I want to believe him but it just makes it so hard to think he doesn't have AJ around for most of the year and I dared to move him away." She admitted.

"Has he said something?" Carol asked.

"Nah, he's Carter. He'll never complain about it."

"But he feels it." Carol said. Abby nodded.

"Again, he's Carter, he'll try to make sure everyone else is okay before taking care of himself." Abby said with a small chuckle.

"He's a good dad isn't he?" Carol more affirmed than asked.

"One of the best, if he and Luka were to fight it off, I would not like to be in the middle of it." Abby turned to see how Luka and Niko laughed at one of Jerry's magic tricks. "I couldn't be at all neutral."

"I wouldn't want to have to choose either, good thing you don't have to, those two are pretty close." Carol smiled.

"Yeah, I guess surviving a war filled Congo together will do that to you." Abby sighed. "It's pretty scary."

"Way too scary." Carol laughed.

They remained quiet as Luka and Carter made their way over. "Boys..." Carol smiled. "Quite the turnout huh?"

"Yes, Rachel seems happy." Luka said.

"Still, I feel like Mark should be here," Carter said sadly. "He'd be so happy of everything she's accomplished."

"I'm pretty sure he knows Carter." Carol said.

"So, you to had a nice conversation?" Luka asked.

"Yeah, you know we were talking about work, kids, the usual." Abby glanced over at Carol nervously.

"I also have a feeling you were talking about us." Carter said. Abby froze, she didn't think they could hear her but then again, she had been caught in the middle of over analyzing the fathers of her children.

"No, of course not."

"Are you sure?" Luka pressured on, looking on at Carter who tried to suppress a smile.

"Go will you? Keep an eye on the kids." Abby waved her arms away. "So? Go on, I don't want Niko to go grabthe candy table again." Luka nodded as he led Carter away.

Yep, those were her boys alright.


	2. Chapter 2

AJ Carter was the kind of kid who helped people. You'd think he'd had it in his blood. The tendency to give it all to others, even though he was a full swing teenager. Having been raised by a former nurse and doctor it was something that came natural to him. He'd never complain about caring for his two little brothers when his mother and Luka asked for a break and he'd always did his chores, well... almost always.

AJ though had a soft spot for his father, who he'd only see a couple times a year. He'd moved to Boston with his mom and Luka at age 6 and they'd never looked back on Chicago ever since, but Carter made sure he was still a part of his child's life. And so did Abby for that matter. She'd regretted how things had ended with her and John back then, two broken hearts, a letter and a plus sign on a stick.

Abby had then ran away for 6 months. Her mind racing, her heart breaking and not telling anyone where she was going. She'd come back just as she was about to give birth, in truth AJ had been born about 4 weeks before he was meant to and that didn't give Abby much choice but to come back to the home she knew.

Luka by her side as she figured what she'd do about her baby. For some reason she'd decided to keep him, even though she resented Carter so much.

In fact, it had been Luka who'd told John he was a father, months after his son had been born and he'd come back on the spot, only to find out during that time he was having a child with Kem.

Abby felt betrayed by all the water under the bridge, as much as Carter, so they decided it was best to try and make it work somehow, Peter had done it with Carla, sort of... why couldn't Carter do it too?

And then he'd lost Joshua and Abby saw him spiral down, heartbroken and hurt, by Kem's indifference and the impotence of having lost his child.

He'd left Chicago then, promising her he'd come and visit AJ a much as he could. How he could walk away from the kid he had left beat Abby but she understood, just like she'd run, he had had to to make sense of what had just happened to him.

Carter found himself at work hours before Rachel's wedding, everyone was going about their day as they waited on the special day. It was then when he'd think about Dr. Greene and just how much he'd missed on his children's lives and it made him feel sick. He'd been stupid enough to walk out and leave for Africa after Kem had left. He'd told Abby he needed to make sense of his life again and promised his son he wouldn't be too far away but it definitely was a mistake to walk from what he already had.

Nevertheless, true to his word, he'd come to Chicago regularly to see AJ and sent Abby money every month even though she'd refused him at first. Carter sighed as stashed everything in his locker and headed outside to the warmth of summer. He moved over to the Center to check on some last minute things and came face to face with AJ, over by the small tribute Carter had made for Joshua. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh hey dad, I asked mom to drop me off. They were going to the kid's museum before the ceremony." AJ said shrugging.

"And you are too much of a man to go huh?" Carter smiled.

"Something like that." AJ said shyly. "No, I wanted to come by that's all."

"Right. Well, since you are here, mind giving me a hand upstairs?" Carter asked.

They made it to his office which was on the top floor. AJ remembered coming to the Center for the first time when it opened.

"Ill begotten gains of my Carter forefathers put to good use." Carter said nostalgically looking over all those years of hard work and what he'd accomplished.

"Redemption?" Kerry Weaver asked.

"Maybe so." Added Carter with a sigh.

"Your grandma would be so proud." Susan said with emotion in her voice.

Carter sighed. "Grandfather's rolling over in his grave. He thought the Carter fortune would last longer than the pyramids."

Susan turned to Carter." You spent it all?"

"No. But most of it."

"You've done a great thing here, John. Truly great."

"Daddy!" Carter heard a small voice say as they all turned around. Abby and Luka stood there.

"My goodness" Carter smiled as he picked the little boy up, wincing a little. "What in the world are you doing here?"

"Oh well, we couldn't miss it." Abby said warmly. "Easy buddy, Daddy's just had surgery, remember?"

"Oh, yeah, they gave you a kidney, right Daddy?"

"That's right." Carter smiled putting the little boy down. "I'm getting better though."

"I'd given you mine but Mommy said it had to be a grownup." AJ said in a matter of facty. Susan turned to glance at Carter.

"That's really sweet AJ, I'll be sure to let you know if I ever need one." Susan said."Hey guys? How about a give you a mini tour. Let's go." Susan took the little boy's hand. Kerry and Luka followed suit.

"Where's Kem?" Abby asked once they'd climbed down the stairs.

"She's in Paris. I don't know if she'll be able to make it." Carter said wearily. "It's fine."

"Is it?" Abby asked. She didn't want to say anything. She didn't have to.

"Honestly? I don't know, I thought we'd be passed it. Or at least that we loved each other enough to make it work." Carter said. They sat beside each other on a couch near by.

"For what it's worth, I am very proud of you." Abby admitted after a moment staring at those hazel eyes. "This is a great thing."

"I thought it was time." Carter said. "Thank you for being here." He took her hand in his, currently feeling self conscious of the fact she was married. "Luka isn't watching, is he?" He joked.

"What are we sixteen? Don't you think we're way passed that?" Abby rolled her eyes at him.

"I know, but he's bigger than me." He sighed. "No really, thank you for this, for bringing over, for not keeping him away from me."

"Why would I? You are his father and I know just how much you love him, that's enough for me."

Carter and AJ walked together strolling down the hallways, everyone would either wave or greet them as they came by. "We better go or we'll be late." Carter said, putting away his stethoscope. As they reached the spot for Joshua's memorial, AJ made an abrupt stop.

"He'd be your age by now." Carter said softly as AJ traced his fingers over.

"It would have been really cool to have met him." The young boy said. "Kem wrote to me the other day, she's moving back to Paris now that her mother is gone."

"Yeah, she mentioned that in her last call too." Carter said.

"Are you two okay?" AJ asked. "I know you're not together anymore or anything..."

"Why is it that you and your mother keep asking me that?" Carter laughed as they went into the parking lot to his car. "I'm fine."

True to his mother's nature, AJ rolled his eyes at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's chapter two! More AJ and Carter central. More Carby on the next one and what's is Luka and Carter's relationship really like?
> 
> Please throw in a review if you can.


	3. Chapter 3

I'm having 15 years of feelings with this fic. Give it a chance guys!

Luka packed just as much as he could into the suitcase just as Abby had instructed. They'd be leaving for Chicago in the morning and he couldn't feel as if a wave of guilt washed over him. He and Abby had made Boston their home for a while now, the prospect of stepping back in time and seeing everyone made him feel uneasy.

"Dad, have you seen my jacket?" Joe asked as he walked passed him. No school meant the apartment was kind of a mess with Abby working long shifts.

"No, sorry, did you finish packing?" He asked his middle child.

"I did. AJ said it was okay." Luka sighed. Bless AJ passes with his well dressed family and just how systematic Carter and Abby were, also it didn't hurt he was the oldest. "The suits are on the closet."

"Good, help me clean up a little will you? We don't want mom to see the place like this." Luka said tiredly. Joe groaned but did as he was told.

"Yes!" Luka heard AJ shout from the end of the hall. "That's awesome. Okay, I'll tell Mom as soon as she gets here."

"Another trip with his grandfather?" Joe asked. Luka smiled.

"Apparently"

Joe rolled his eyes at his older brother. AJ was used to spending summers out in Chicago with Carter and his grandfather, who were the closest to him in the family. Joe envied him a bit sometimes, he was sure he'd be getting a car as soon as he was old enough and maybe even a bigger place than the one they lived in right now, after all, the Carter family was loaded.

"Luka," AJ came out of the room, ruffled hair and hazel eyes. He was all Carter just as everyone always told Abby, she avoided explaining of course, but AJ would give her out by calling Luka by his name. "Dad wants to talk to you." the teen handed over the phone and Luka smiled.

His relationship with Carter was far from one he'd imagine most had, Alex had told him once that divorced parents and most teenage TV series or really any at all always portrayed divorces like it was some big battlefront. But Luka had seen war and it didn't look anything like whatever dynamic they had going on for years.

Luka understood just how important Carter was to Abby and viceversa. He'd been the one with her longer at first. And they both understood just how much pain their addictions had caused them and well, he was the father of her first child.

That was the main reason Luka understood and felt a surge of jealousy towards Carter, but he was to blame really.

He'd been the one who had come back to find him back in Congo , and for that Luka would forever be grateful. Had he done it for Abby? Most likely. But for Luka, that wasn't what was most important, after all he'd been a bystander to Abby's struggles for years, starting by the fact she had disappeared for months and come back heavily pregnant.

And it had been Luka who had told John he had had a child. His first time betraying her, but the decision was worth it to Luka as he watched the little boy and he thought of Marko and of his own family lost years ago.

If someone had told him he had a child somewhere back then and another chance to raise it he'd jump to the opportunity.

"Here." Luka said as soon as Carter ended the call. "I'll talk to your mother about it."

"Thanks Luka, you're the best!" AJ smiled as he went back to his room.

The best? Luka didn't think so. To his children maybe, to AJ he was one of his best friends or so he'd tried, he'd made best friends with the child just as he could.

It was the next best thing as he'd already had a father.

"So how's work?" Carter asked as soon as they made out of the back of his car. Small talk, between him and Abby mostly these days. They'd see less and less of Carter as he was busier with the Center and picking up shifts at County.

Abby would say he was over compensating.

"Its, good, Luka cut off his work a bit and I'm getting into gear for a tenure." Abby said.

AJ looked back and forth between his parents as Luka made sure they were checked in the hotel.

"Abby, that's great. We've got to celebrate that. Why didn't you tell me?"

" I don't know, this is not about me." Abby said annoyed. "We´re here for Rachel."

"Well I just made it about you, We don't have to be at the rehearsal for a couple hours. Lunch?"

"We have to eat when we get there." She said but then she took a moment. "We could do coffee? Ice cream?"

"Great. Sounds like a plan."

So she'd found herself alone with Carter and their son in a coffee shop, Luka had bowed down gracefully and said he wanted to get the boys to the pool and get some sleep.

It was certainly strange for AJ to have some one on one time with his parents.

Luka was there most times instead of his dad.

"So this is nice huh?" Carter asked. AJ smiled, his mother's smile. "What?"

"It's weird, almost like we're a real family." The boy said wearily.

"Oh come on buddy." Abby began.

"We are a family AJ,we're just not..."

"Normal?" AJ put in. "It's fine, I get it."

His parents stared at each other for a moment. "So did you tell dad about swimming?" AJ's head snapped up.

"Swimming?"

"Unconventional excercise. Acute asmtha can do that to you." AJ said.

Abby then felt shivers, if that didn't sound like Carter...Abby smiled a little.

"How's that going? Asthma I mean."

"It's been under control, we have been monitoring him closely." Abby told John. AJ rolled his eyes. "Too doctory?"

"A little yeah," Carter said before AJ could reply.

And so they laughed, together almost like a real family.

Luka often thought of what had become of his life since coming to America and working at County. Between Sam and Abby and the turmoil that had been going to Congo with Carter.

Carter. Most people thought he'd hate the man, he'd resent him in someway as he'd become close to Abby first. Had given her a child first. A child that would have most likely become Luka's if he'd kept quiet.

Or maybe not. Yet Carter seemed better and Luka was far from hating him, call him religious but he'd saved Luka and it was because of that decision that he had had another chance with Abby.

But sometimes, just sometimes he wished he and Abby weren't as close. Far from it and still Luka had heard Abby talk to Neela about Carter and there was not denying she would forever care for him.

Just as he'd cared for Sam. But Abby had actually called Carter her best friend. Not that she had admitted it openly to him.

Yes, she was married to him but Carter still kept a rope around Abby's heart.

It wasn't just because they shared a child together, it was because of that and the fact that, that boy was too much like John that Abby couldn't let go, Luka learned long ago.

"Hey." He heard her say softly as she entered the bathroom where she was apparently getting ready. She wore a simple navy dress. "Everything okay?"

Luka smiled. "Yes. Being here, just makes me nostalgic."

"I'll say." Abby said cheekily. "I can't believe it's been almost ten years since we left."

"Do I really have to wear this?" AJ asked. "It's too hot for it."

"As soon as the ceremony is over you can take it off." Carter said arranging his jacket.

"Promise?" AJ asked.

"I promise." Carter smiled. They'd meet the rest of the guest at the wedding. AJ followed his father to his trusted jeep.

They made it just as the other guests had began to gather. Carter left the keys for the valet and guided his child inside. The church stood tall on the background as they walked.

The first person they spotted as Elizabeth. "I'm seeing double." She said. "Look at you all handsome."

"I could say the same thing about you and Ella." Carter smiled. "How are you Elizabeth?"

"Good, very good. You?" The woman smiled. "Glad to have this young man home, I assume?"

"It's good to be home." AJ agreed. "I'm staying for the entire summer."

"Well that is certainly good news." Elizabeth said. "I might be staying for a while longer myself. Rachel won't be going on her honeymoon right away so Ella wants to spend a little time with her before she goes."

And just like that Ella called for AJ to come join her as she quickly said their hellos. "Teenagers." Carter said as they watched them walk away.

"That they are, although it is hard to believe so. Specially yours. Now makes me feel old."

"You're not old." Carter assed quickly.

"Oh and you are?"

"Depends on how you look at it." Carter sighed. "How's England?"

"It has it charms, still. Although I do miss a lot things about Chicago."

"Like?"

"My friends and feeling close to Mark, specially today."

"Yeah, I know." Carter said. "It must be hard on Rachel." Carter had taken the young girl under his wing just as Mark had done for him.

It had come full circle for John and his old mentor.

"She's ask me and her mother to walk her down the aisle, did I tell you that?"

"Really?" Carter smiled. "That seems appropriate."

"Yes, I think she wants to feel herself close to her father, on her wedding day more so, even if it's trough me." Elizabeth said wearily. "And how's the Center working?"

"Sustaining itself for now, I even got some people doing volunteer work, much like the days when Carol's clinic was running, some old patients come to us for help too, people that were treated at County." Carter beamed proudly.

"Really?" Corday smiled. "Congratulations John."

"Thank you, thank you. Not that I can take the credit for it. There are a lot of hardworking people around."

"Starting with you. It's your project after all, Carter."

"Yeah, but the work is made great by people working together, I learned that at County."

"After resigning from surgery?" Elizabeth said. "Peter always talks about you and how surgery wasn't your thing."

Carter blinked. "You and Benton talk? About me?"

"We talk about a lot of things, but yes you come in matter once in a while." Dr. Corday said.

Carter huffed. "Of course."

"And you? Aside from County. How's everything else?"

"Personally? Work doesn't give me a lot of time for much else really. Not that I have the will or anything to date anymore." There was a glint of sadness in his voice as he looked down. "Nothing too formal."

"Is that why you didn't bring a date?" Elizabeth asked.

"Has something to do with it, yes." John put in.

"And Abby..."

Carter looked over at Elizabeth. "What do you mean?"

"Well, she's the mother of your child and for what I've been gathering over the years. You two care for each other very much."

"We have a child to raise, that is the only thing binding us together." Carter said rather quickly.

"Really? Because I see something else whenever I look at either of you..."

"Mom!" They heard Ella call. "We need you. Rachel is freaking out!"

"Duty calls." Elizabeth sighed. "I'll see you out there?" She touched Carter's arm softly and took her leave.

And Carter was left there to wonder just how much of his mind and heart could take of seeing Abby? Because everytime he did, he felt further away from her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm having 15 years of feels with this fic. Give it a chance guys!


	4. Chapter 4

Abby sighed as her zipper got caught one more time. "Joe honey, come here a minute." She called her middle child.

"Shouldn't we be going already, we're late." He said.

"Where's your dad?" Joe shrugged. "Here, help me with the zipper will you?" Joe nodded as he focused on the task at hand. "I think that's it. Thank you baby, now please go find your dad."

Her phone buzzed as she watched Joe stride across the hotel room in search for Luka. It was Susan.

"Hey." Abby smiled. "Are you there yet?"

"Yes. Almost everyone's here. How about you guys?"

"I don't know where Luka is." Abby huffed. "So...there's that."

"What?"

"Yesterday, after we got back from the rehearsal dinner, he was acting weird. At first I thought he'd had too much to drink but now I'm not so sure."

"You don't think he and Carter..." Susan implied. Abby bit her lip. If anything they'd been acting very chummy with each other. "Abby?"

"No. I don't think so. They know better than that." She said.

"What does that mean?" Susan asked.

"Long story... let's just say we all have an agreement." She replied coily, grabbing her cel as she cleaned Niko's face and fought to dress him. "Can I call you in a minute? I'm in the middle of..."

"Of course. I'll see you in a bit." Susan said. "I'll keep an eye on your boys in the meantime."

Carter wasn't... or was he? He'd told her she was part of his chaos theory. She wasn't sure if he still was anything but the father of her child, but that was quite a thing to have loom over her specially after how things had ended with them at the beginning.

She'd considered the most awful thing back then. Not only because she was furious at him and wanted to hurt him but because she was terrified her child would turn out like Maggie and Eric. Make her life more of the mess it already was.

But she couldn't. She thought of the smallpox case and all that had implied for her. Two weeks of her and Carter and nothing else.

His being there and her too, then neither of them... it was such a mess, just like their relationship seemed to be. And then there was the sweetness of it all. The need for him and the longing and just how much she loved him.

And then there was Adam. Oh god. She remembered Carter risking himself to save that little boy. He'd come back to the hospital the week after she'd found out she was pregnant.

And she could see it all. Just how much that experience had changed her. His mom had asked for her and Carter.

And Abby was all they got because John was off with Luka.

Luka.

Just how much she and Luka had gone trough too. And she really loved him. He was the father of her children and her husband.

She couldn't have chosen anyone better than Luka to marry.

Except Maybe Carter. Her head was spinning. She'd said she would never marry again after what had happened with Richard and then she'd rejected John and gone to marry Luka.

What was the difference between the two? Both her boys had been born out of wedlock anyway.

What had been better? When Carter had proposed she hadn't been pregnant but when Luka had asked her, they already had a child?

What did that say about her?

"Abby?" It was Luka. "Are you ready? The car's waiting for us."

Carter saw as Elizabeth went to Rachel's aid as AJ made his way back to where he was standing. "I just saw Dr. Benton and Reese." He told him. "Did I tell you I'm learning sign language? I'm not good at it but..."

"You hadn't actually..."

"Well, there's this kid in my class. He has an aid teacher and everything but he barely has any friends so I sit with him at lunch."

Carter smiled. "That's remarkable of you..."

"Well, the whole Doctors Without Borders thing?" AJ quirked up. "It sort of rubs up on you."

"I for one I'm very proud." Carter told him as Benton, Cleo and Reese walked over. "I want to hear more about that later."

"Is he teaching you the bad ways? Let me know." Peter told AJ shooting Carter a look. AJ turned to Reese who was glad to see his language skills had improved.

"We Facetime." AJ said when Carter shot them both a look.

"Did you know about this?" John asked Peter.

"Well, looks like the Carter and Benton boys are meant to be huh?" Cleo smiled.

"Unfortunately." Benton sighed. "Have you seen anyone else yet?"

"Elizabeth was here a moment ago but was ushered due to a bride crisis."

"Oh." Cleo said. "I'll go find them then. Play nice boys." She called.

"So, how's County?" Peter asked. "You keep messing up?"

"Always." Carter smirked. "It's going well I think, I'm picking less and less shifts as the Center seems to take up most of my time."

"Right." Peter said.

"And you? Private Practice?"

"Seemed the right thing now that Reese is in college." Peter huffed.

"College?" He turned to Reese. "That's great buddy."

Reese smiled at him. " Literature, right?"

"What about you AJ?" Benton asked.

"Right now, if I can get on with Math, that's enough for me." The teen said. "Chemistry... that's a whole mess."

Benton shared a glance with Carter. "There you are!" Susan called. "Let's go, we're about to go sit. Where's Cleo?"

"We lost her to the bride." Carter said. "I'm surprised you aren't there."

"Too many people and tears. I'm good." Susan said.

"Hey aunt Susan, I sort of miss Cosmo." AJ said. Susan and Carter had remained the best of friends since he'd returned to Chicago.

"Well, he's camping with his dad for the next few weeks or so but you'll see him soon." She told him. "Come on, let's go, before we lose the best seats."


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to finish this in honor of my love for the series :)

Elizabeth smiled widely as Rachel announced she was almost ready. It was time to keep one of the promises she'd made Mark years ago. "Rachel, would you mind coming here a moment?" Rachel smiled. They had been so close in the later years as she had decided to pursue a career in medicine.

"Of course." She led Rachel to a small room next to the one the others were getting ready.

"I promised myself to do this before they finished up your make up but I hadn't built up the courage." Elizabeth said, taking the small envelope, it seemed at least a decade old. Rachel examined it closely.

"Is it from Dad?" Elizabeth nodded.

"He made me promise to give it to you." Dr. Corday smiled. "Like the one when you graduated from High School." Rachel took the letter into her hands, she had suddenly began to shake. "I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologizing?" Rachel inquired. "This is amazing, getting letters from Dad after all this time, knowing he's still here with me." She remained quiet. "I wish he could see me now."

"He sees you sweetheart." Elizabeth said, her eyes already too gone with tears. "He's always with you."

Carter took his seat next to Susan as other guest began to take their places. " Is it taking too long?" He heard Susan ask him.

"What?"

"For it to start. Maybe Rachel's got cold feet." She said.

"Rachel? No.. you and I know she's crazy about Jamie." Carter smiled. "Probably just had a problem with the dress or something."

"Right, I keep forgetting you're a guy." Susan huffed. "Where's Abby anyway, I thought you said she was on her way."

"Is not like I keep tabs on her Susan." John said.

"Oh, you two had a fight?" Susan asked. "Did you?"

"No, of course not." Carter sighed. "We have a very civilized relationship."

"Oh... I bet you do. Like me and Chuck." She put in.

Carter sighed. He really didn't know where he and Abby stood aside from being AJ's parents. She was married to Luka of all people. Luka who loved and cared for his child.

But she did call him occasionally, using AJ as a sort of excuse to check on him. To see of he was as functional as she hoped he'd be.

"No, we're not divorced Susan, we have a child together. It's different."

Abby took a deep breath as she and Luka made a late entrance to the wedding. The vows had already started. She spotted her old friends, including Carter and AJ sitting a few rows back from where Rachel's family was.

Niko kept fussing in Luka's arms so he excused himself and made it back into the garden to walk for a bit so he wouldn't start crying. Susan Lewis then waved at Abby who dragged Joe along so they could sit.

"Everything okay?" She asked. Abby explained to her she was no longer used to living in the city as an excuse for just how messy her kids had been and how fashionably late they'd make her be. "It's okay. Where's Luka?"

"Calming off the toddler. Remind me again why I wanted to have another child?"

"Because of your incredibly hot european husband?" Susan said.

"You two do know I'm sitting right here?" AJ said annoyed. Carter pushed his head to the side so he'd focus on the ceremony. Abby smiled as she and Carter shared a knowing look.

Just as the ceremony ended AJ decided to take off after Ella. He couldn't take any more comments from his parents old friends and co- workers about how much he reminded them of his dad or how he had Abby's nose.

"Is he okay?" Cleo asked Abby as they walked over to the lawn for the reception.

"Yeah, seems so. I mean it's been a while since he's had three parents to deal with." She said. "You know how it is."

"Yes well, I remember what it was like to have to deal with Carla's demands over Reese but he's grown now." Cleo said. "Plus, I don't believe for a second Carter would be the jealous type. He didn't fight you when you moved to Boston."

Abby smiled. No, that was what was best about his relationship with Carter. He put his child first, above all of what he might want. Maybe a little too much sometimes.

"Well, that's Carter for you. He puts everyone above him every time." Abby told her.

"Is that a bad thing?" Cleo inquired. "I mean he lets you live in peace, that's more than Carla ever did after Peter got custody of Reese."

"I honestly don't know." Abby's gaze caught Carter and Benton as they seemed to be put on the same table. Luka walked closely behind.

"I guess we're all together. Do the kids have a different table?" Susan asked.

"Seems so." Cleo put in.

AJ walked over then with Ella and Reese. He went to say his hellos to everyone at his parent's table. Ganma would roll over on her grave if he didn't do well to the Carter name.

"I think we're sitting over there." AJ said as the other kids seemed to be gathering a few tables away. "Come on guys." He called his brothers.

"Ella, aren't you sitting nearer your sister?" Cleo asked.

"No. Apparently I was put in the kiddie table." She said. "I don't mind, not really."

"I guess we could drag Elizabeth over here." Carol who'd just arrived said. "There's a free seat."

"Oh yes, Doug. Why isn't he here again?" Susan asked.

"Why is it that you want to know about everyone's dates?" Cater said cheekily much to everyone's surprise.

"Ok, sorry." Susan said. "I was just asking, who put vodka in your juice?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part two of the wedding is coming up and AJ gets in trouble!


End file.
